O.C. mother, daughter have fostered more than 100 children ...

FOUNTAIN VALLEY ? Sallie Miller points to a wall covered with photos of nearly 100 babies and starts naming them one by one ? the one who weighed 4 pounds at 1 week old, the one with shaken baby syndrome and the one who now attends Juilliard.

"They're all little survivors," Miller said as she held the newest addition to her family, a 2-month-old boy recently removed from a house where authorities found a meth lab.

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Seven steps to foster care

• Call the information line at 888-871-KIDS (5437) to request a Foster Care Packet or find it online at OC4Kids.com.
• Register to attend an orientation by calling or emailing oc4kids@ssa.ocgov.com. A class schedule is also available online.
• Attend the orientation to receive an application.
• Submit your application. A home inspection and fingerprinting are required.
• Complete a six-week Parent Resources for Information, Development, and Education (PRIDE) training program.
• Become licensed. Licensing requirements include clearances for all adults living in the home, completion of a CPR/First Aid class, and passing a home-safety assessment. For a complete list of licensing requirements, go to OC4Kids.com.
• An agency social worker will call to ask to place a foster child in your home.

Source: OC4Kids.com and Orange County Social Services Agency.

For more than 20 years, Miller and her daughter, Jennifer Snider, have collectively fostered nearly 150 children as part of the Orange County Social Services Emergency Shelter Home program, providing homes for kids who have no one to take care of them.

Upstairs at Miller's home is a nursery lined with light pink, blue and yellow ducks complete with a white crib, curtains and sunshine filling the room. There's also a packed bag sitting by the door.

"The day you get them, you have to prepare for when they leave," said Miller, 66.

The length of time a baby stays with Miller varies, but the shortest time she's fostered was one day and the longest was two years. Most of the children Miller takes in are born premature, have been exposed to drugs or alcohol and can come to her at a moment's notice.

Miller was recently honored by Fountain Valley for her work in foster care after her friend, Monica Milstead, told the mayor about her story. Milstead, of Irvine, adopted her son when he was 3 months old after he was fostered by Miller 18 years ago.

"Sallie is great at what she does. She's very disciplined about a schedule and for the first time, maybe in their life, they get to trust a routine and have security," Milstead said.

Foster parents like Miller are invaluable, and surrogate families provide children the safety they need, said Terry Lynn Fisher, spokeswoman for the county's Social Services Agency.

Children are removed from their homes if there is an imminent risk or danger, Fisher said.

During the first 24 hours, the agency will look for relatives, extended family or friends to take care of the child. If that's not possible, children are placed in foster homes or emergency foster homes like Miller's and Snider's.

"There is a critical need for foster families, especially to take sibling groups and willing to take children with physical, emotional, mental disabilities or medical problems," Fisher said.

In July, 2,813 dependents of the court had open cases, Fisher said.

CREATING A HOME

Miller, who also teaches foster parenting classes for the county and runs a foster parent support group, said most of the people she meets ask her why she doesn't just adopt.

"I never went into this to adopt. They're little lost souls and it's a true joy to see the kids go to a nice home. They get to have a start," said Miller, who has three grown children of her own.

The hardest part of the job is not knowing what conditions the baby was born in and not being able to identify his or her needs. Miller says it's heartbreaking to imagine that the tiny 2-month-old in her arms was inhaling meth fumes just a week ago.

Schedule and routine are especially important for these babies. Miller usually takes in one baby at a time and has taken in siblings.

The babies often get agitated during monitored visits with parents, so afterwards she'll give them a bath, bottle and swaddle them to calm them down. Since they're on a schedule, the routine gives them a sense of security, she said.

While Miller's home is calm, quiet and practically serene, about five miles away her daughter's home is bustling with activity.

It was a typical busy morning and the Sniders' oldest son, Nathan, a junior at Fountain Valley High School, was already out the door with football gear in tow. Their 5-year-old adopted daughter, Natalie, had just been dropped off at school and three foster children were at home.

The 4-year-old twins, who were crib-bound until age 2 and diagnosed with autism, were finishing up with two occupational therapists who come to the home six days a week. The couple also have a 2-month-old they've had since birth because the mother was incarcerated after being charged with child abuse.

Paul Snider, who took the early part of the family morning shift while his wife was working, leaves for work himself just as the twins get on the bus to go to a special education preschool. The baby is ready to take a nap after two feedings. It's about 10:45 a.m.

"Now I'll have some sanity," Jennifer Snider, 38, said.

Taking care of a family of seven is no easy task. Snider averages about 20 loads of laundry a week and is still trying to figure out how to organize all the shoes.

MAKING THE COMMITMENT

Snider was 16 when she first asked her mother to start fostering after learning her friend's mother was a foster parent.

"I was young and I thought it would be fun and we could dress them up so cute," she said.

A year later, her mother became a foster parent and a year after that Snider got certified. Both women went through a series of classes, a licensing workshop, CPR certification and passed home safety inspections among other requirements to become foster parents.

Miller fostered her first child at 20 and has fostered 52 children since.

Many of the children require rehabilitation, some wake up with night terrors and babies have cried for several days straight.

"It's hard the first night," Snider said. "The first week is usually H-E, double L."

The toughest part is letting them go, but you mentally prepare yourself for it, she said.

Even though fostering is meant to be temporary, a bond with the child is quickly formed.

"We get attached to every single one that comes into our home," Snider said. "When they leave and you don't shed a tear, you haven't done your job."

Miller still keeps in touch with many of the children she's fostered. About 20 adults and 30 kids attend her yearly Easter and Christmas parties.

"I've always wanted to have a large family," she said.

Source: http://www.ocregister.com/news/miller-374830-foster-children.html

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